Why we Feel Anger Towards Those we Love.
Why I was often felt angry, was because deep down, at the bottom of my being, I was afraid of losing control of my world. There was the fear that if that happened I would lose everything. I would be proven to be a fool, thus I would not be loved or accepted by anyone ever again.
Often times I misunderstood a person or a situation. I had to learn to be more open and honest about what I was thinking and feeling. Therefore, I did so as soon as possible. Misunderstandings, I found out, once cleared up, rarely occur again. Listening to each other and getting to the bottom of an issue is essential to dealing with misunderstandings. Misunderstandings often are the cause of the reaction of anger to begin with.
Venting Anger as Opposed to Suppressing Anger
Although I often felt anger, I felt it was important to not vent my anger, but to keep calm. It cut back on a whole lot of guilt feelings in the long run. I feel more in control now, no longer fearful of losing out on something. Somehow, I have learned to put my intellect over my emotions, and in so doing have regained my self respect. I may not be able to change what I have done in the past; however, I can change what I do today and in the future.
I do not vent my anger nor do I suppress my anger. Doing so only made matters worse in the long run. I learned to discuss my feelings. If not with the person associated with my anger, then with someone who could help me figure out a solution to solve the problem. Sometimes people and or a situation will never change. Therefore, we have to either move on to something new or learn to give up the anger we are experiencing.