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Does A Grandparents Have the Right to Interfere With the Raising of a Grandchild?
A grandparents love may be a very important part of a child’s life, but it usually is not essential. My sons saw the mistakes I made as a parent and so did I, therefore, they have every right to do the parenting in their own way. If, however, my grandchildren were in an abusive situation, I would have the responsibility to speak up. And that is the only time I would feel compelled to interfere. I would make damned sure that what I was observing was abuse, not something I was making up out of my own beliefs.
Before we jump in with both feet, it is essential to get our facts straight. Ask questions as to why something appears to be as we think it is. Don’t be judgmental, listen to the response with an open mind. Once you know the truth, then you are in a better place to decide how to handle the situation. If you suspect something is wrong, do something to make it right.
The is a ton of material online to help you to recognize the signs of abuse. This is one of many sites that is excellent for anyone who finds themselves worrying about a child or children. Link at Signs of Abuse.
Grandparenting and Jealousy.
Do “grandparenting and jealousy” sometimes go hand in hand? A grandparents love may not always be pure, but it should be unconditional. We may be jealous, it’s important to note that as grandparents we may become jealous of the other set of grandparents, or we may become jealous of one grandparent. My grandchildren have 4 sets of grandparents. I used to feel jealous that my x and his wife we able to spend more time with the kids than I could. However, I soon realized that I truly loved the little sweethearts. I naturally want them to receive as much love and attention as they could get. Therefore, any grandparent can do the job of loving, and should always be given every opportunity to do so.
I have now found ways to spend quality time and it works out just fine. As grandparents we need to keep the peace and not start wars over who gets to be with the children. It is so ridiculous to be jealous of such a thing. When a child receives unconditional love, it is a selfish thing to be jealous of who supplies it. We may not always like or agree with what the other grandparents bring to the family dynamics. It is not the child’s problem, or the parent’s problem, it is our problem, and it is up to us to get over our jealousy.
What a Wonderful Position we are in to be Grandparents.
What a wonderful position we are in as a grandparent. We can lavish all the love and attention we want to give. When we are fortunate enough we get to enjoy them fully, however, we rarely have to discipline them. It is not our responsibility to raise them. Luckily we get to visit for a while and at the end of the day we go home. Then we carry all the fun memories with us. It’s an honor to spend time with them and I never take them or the time we spend together for granted.
“Our grandchildren accept us for ourselves, without rebuke or effort to change us, as no one in our entire lives has ever done, not our parents, siblings, spouses, friends – and hardly ever our own grown children.”
Ruth Goode